Wednesday, February 15, 2012

why i don't do oranges

Before we begin, let's make it clear that we're not talking about cuties. We're talking about oranges. I've got a beef to pick with cuties, too, but that's for another day.

Oranges take effort. So much time to peel them. And your fingers get covered in that strange chalky orange coating. (And for someone who doesn't like to leave her desk, walking to the bathroom to rinse the orangey mess is a chore.) And then after you've spent all this time peeling the orange, it seems 1 of 3 oranges aren't even any good! And if you slice them soccer-team style and bite into them, the fibers get stuck in your teeth. 

So, you see, the effort to benefit ratio just isn't high enough for me.

I don't like those odds. I'll stick with apples.

But today my coworker brought in oranges from her tree and convinced me that they are oh so sweet and worth the work. It took some convincing, but I gave in. 

It took work. It was super messy. But, oh, was it sweet. Yum.

So if you can convince me that the orange you're giving me is good, I will put in the work. 


madichan said...

Ahem. You need this bad boy:

So, I like to think of my past relationships in terms of how I was changed from that experience. This tool was one of the huge perks that I took away from my high school boyfriend.

Tamra said...

Agreed, Molly! When you can't get a consistent good taste from oranges, they're not worth the risk. Apples are sometimes mediocre, but mediocre on the good side of the scale, and rarely are they lousy.

(You have an important typo in this blog post, by the way. Not trying to be nit picky or anything, but you said that your co-worker brought in apples from her tree. It's an important difference! ... Now you will start publicly pointing out all my typos, I hope.)

Molly said...

Madika--I will score the orange first next time. But you still need to peel off the pieces, right? I'll have you show me next time I need to peel an orange (muahaha). Good thing you had that high school boyfriend, huh?

Tamra--It's a good friend who points out an error (considering I don't like errors). Thank you!

Em said...

Amen amen and amen. You read minds.

Jenni said...

This is one of the reasons I don't eat a lot of oranges. They take effort. In fact, that's a big reason that I don't eat a lot of things. If it takes effort, it better be good. Although, my mom would say that the effort helps burn calories. But, since I don't really care about that, I just don't eat things. Orange peelers do help, though. I actually like to slice them "soccer style" and peel them from there. You don't get the fibers stuck in your teeth that way, but it is messy. And since you don't like to leave your desk...

Molly said...

Just figured out that you use the tool Madika linked to actually peel it, too. Not just score it. I'm sold. Maybe I'll even buy them for all of you guys for Christmas. Remind me in December. ;)