Thursday, November 10, 2011

letters to my mom: part 2 of 2



On to note #2...



This note I wrote on my own. Looks like it was March of 2001, so I was 19 years old, living at Liberty Square, which was the next logical step after the dorms, right? How do I know it was 2001? I mentioned that Tiffany gave a free concert at BYU. Ah, memories.

My mom had just sent me (and probably my sisters) a list of her top 10 qualities to look for in a spouse. Not that she was pressuring us to get married--we were never pressured to get married or have babies by our parents. I was always grateful for this when my friends would complain about family pressure. So in response, I sent her the top 10 12 qualities I'd want in my future husband (which, naturally, I wrote before I looked at her list, lest I be swayed by her opinions). Here they are:
  1. Great sense of humor but not too sarcastic
  2. Shares my religious views
  3. Likes children
  4. Goal-oriented
  5. Taller than me, fit
  6. Athletic, likes outdoors
  7. Great singing voice
  8. Outgoing
  9. Very accepting of people different than him
  10. Strong testimony
  11. Comfortable w/ talking out problems
  12. Cares about his appearance
Looks like I did a pretty good job with Christian, eh? Turns out it doesn't actually matter if your husband can serenade you. He sings next to me at church and holds a decent tune. ;) That's good enough to check off #7. Check. Check. Check.

What would I add to the list now?
  1. Patient
  2. Able to admit when he's wrong
  3. Trustworthy
  4. Able to look on the bright side of life
And a note to my 19-year-old self to be all these things if I wanted to find a partner with these qualities.

8 comments:

mj said...

you better believe i was in the quad for that tiffany concert.

LJ, DC and ML said...

Both of these lists were super cute. What was on your mama's list?

Ashley said...

I want to know your mom's list too! How fun to find these. And I remember Tiffany coming!

Julia Wade said...

you found him item for item. i love that.

Chris said...

Guess what? I found the original list- actually 18 thoughts (in random order) which I sent to all my kids (not just the girls). l. Believes in himself (herself-understood) 2.Comes from a supportive family 3.You love each other 4. Gets along with his family - respects them 5.. Has same value system as spouse (church member, etc.) 6. Kind & considerate (to spouse, friends, co-workers) 7. Ambitious, hard working 8. Brings out the best in you (you feel happy when together or just thinking about him) 9. You respect him - are proud to introduce him as your boyfriend, fiance, or spouse 10. Is easy to talk openly with, doesn't belittle your ideas, shares feelings 11. Good sense of humor 12.share similar interests, hobbies 13. Honest, moral 14.Good parenting skills 15.Willing to work to support family 16.Fits comfortably with your friends & family 17.Respects himself - no problems with substance abuse 18. Respects you

Amy Carter said...

oh man, i remember the list!

Ashley C. said...

I don't remember the list. Ha, perhaps I should have paid closer attention to it!

Molly said...

Maren--So funny to think that we were both there!

Lenessa--My mom added her list in the comments. I knew she'd still have it!

Ashley--You were there for Tiffany, too? Awesome.

Julia--I agree!

Mom--You have a great list. I love the part about being proud to introduce him as your spouse. It's very true.

Amy--I take it you didn't send your own list back to mom? ;)

Ashley--I didn't remember the list either, actually. You should make one now!