Monday, April 5, 2010

on being a working mom

Everyone is in a different situation in life. Some moms work because their husbands are in school. Some moms work because they need two incomes to survive. Some moms are the family bread-winners because it just makes sense financially. Some moms have to work because they are single parents. And some moms work because they love what they do.

I am going to give you my perspective from my stage of life.

I am a working mom. And I work two jobs. I work a full time job during the day and a part-time job at night.

Why do I work?

I work for many reasons. I work so my husband can finish school. I work so that we can pay our rent and have medical benefits. I work because my husband was laid off in July. I work a second job so that we don't have to dip too far into our savings each month. I work a second job because I love what I do and I chose to keep it. I work to be a good example to my son. I work because that is what people do.

Would I rather be at home?

Sure. Who wouldn't? I would bet that every working parent (mothers and fathers alike) would rather be at home. I think most people would love to work part time and spend a lot more time at home. Home life isn't always glamorous, but it's where your family is.

Do I resent the fact that I am working two jobs?

Not one bit. I could have quit my part-time job, but that wouldn't have been financially responsible. Christian would work two jobs in a heartbeat if our roles were reversed. That said, I love knowing that Christian and Graham are home together. Graham can't get enough of his daddy. I was secretly hoping Graham would be a mama's boy, but there's no denying he LOVES his daddy.

I am grateful that Christian and I will have a great understanding and compassion for both roles. We know what it is like to be at home and have days when we don't get anything accomplished no matter how hard we try. We know what it is like to have to walk away from a smiling baby in order to leave for work in the morning. We understand each other. For that I am grateful.

I work because that's where I am in life, and that's a pretty good reason in my book.

9 comments:

Ian, Jessica, Halle and now Camdyn! said...

I hear ya, I completely understand where you are coming from...I felt like I grew in many ways when I was working and now that I'm at home I am sacrificing certain things but gaining many others. Life is funny and when it comes right down to it, we are here just for that, to learn and grow and appreciate our blessings. Way to go, in a couple years, or months, I'm sure things will change again, thats the way it goes! Your a good momma! When I was working I always felt like I was missing out and not being a good parent but now that I look back, I'm grateful Ian had that time with Halle, just how you are feeling with Christian. I also feel like working gave me a stronger testimony of family and the gospel because they were who I wanted to cleave to when I was around them....all good things! Thanks for the post, you always have fun insight and you are a great mother!!!

LJ, DC and ML said...

AMEN. And AMEN

Ashley said...

Great post. You have a really good attitude about working. It's nice that Graham is home with the world's favorite babysitter so you never have to worry about him. Still, I am excited for you to get to stay home! It's nice that you and Christian will always understand what the other spouse is dealing with all day.

nicole said...

:) last week I was there.. this week maternity leave! yippeee! oh, but that does come with another child - win win!

Courtney said...

you go girl!

Cheryl and William said...

Very well stated- I'm sure that both Christian and Graham are grateful for all of the work that you do

The Winkelman's said...

Molly, I seriously love you. You have such a good head on your shoulders and are such an awesome woman. I totally look up to you and am proud of you for doing what YOU feel is right. The world needs more women like you.

Dr. aafb said...

Drake is a daddy's boy too and Sam isn't even home with him that much. He just loves him. I know where you are at and love to here the perspectives of others.

Em said...

Hi, I'm a stranger clicking over from Ashley's blog. I just happened to be browsing and read this post and wanted to thank you!

I'm pregnant right now and am facing a similar dilemma. Everyone--especially women--respond passionately about whether a mother should work or not and I haven't wanted to talk to anyone about it. Anyway, I have the opportunity to continue to work once my baby is born. Whether I will, I don't know yet. But the option is there.

So, thank you for your post and providing me with clarity and a fresh non-judgmental opinion. :)