Sunday, January 17, 2010

on being self reliant

Just a little background: In our church we have a program called Visiting Teaching. Each woman visits and is also visited by other women in the ward (congregation) to share spiritual messages, be a friend, and provide help when needed. Each month we share a different message. Because you get to "teach" the message as well as "be taught" the message, you get many different perspectives on it.

This month's message is about becoming self reliant. I liked this quote from the Relief Society president, Julie Beck:

“How do we become self-reliant? We become self-reliant through obtaining sufficient knowledge, education, and literacy; by managing money and resources wisely, being spiritually strong, preparing for emergencies and eventualities; and by having physical health and social and emotional well-being.”

I was recently chatting with my friend (and visiting teacher--lucky me!), April, and we were talking about our desires to become self reliant. So I am going to break down the categories here and share my goals with you all. After all, we can't very well take care of others very well if our lives aren't in order. We are responsible for


In terms of being prepared to support myself, I can be financially self reliant if need be. I have 5 years of administrative experience, have a Master's degree to teach English, and am certified and have experience as a substitute teacher. It puts my mind at ease. If I ever go back to school, it will be for nutrition. Some day. Since I don't have time to go to school right now, I will read more.


This is my area of focus right now. It has to be. We are short money because I am only going back to work part time for a couple of months. For me it's worth giving up the money to be home with Graham a little bit more (we'll talk about that later). So I am slowly improving my budgeting skills, making meals instead of eating out, and spending much less on frivolous things.


I'm certainly lacking here. Let me tell you: At church I have been in primary (the organization for kids) for about 5 years. I played the piano for the kids for almost 5 years and now I am in the presidency. The problem is that I never paid much attention--I just played whatever song they told me to. So now that I'm in the presidency, I'm still absolutely clueless about how primary works. I am finally figuring things out and not relying on other people to tell me what to do. It feels good to contribute. I get way more out of church now.

I have also shirked my responsibilities by depending on Christian for my spiritual well being. I use the excuse that he's the priesthood holder in the home and should therefore be the spiritual leader in our home. This is the most ridiculously lame excuse for my laziness. A priesthood holder is no closer to Heavenly Father than I am. It doesn't work that way. My spirituality is my own and I am just as responsible as him for the well-being of our family and the state of our home. I will be self-reliant when it comes to my spirituality.

Emergency Preparedness

Hmmmm. More or less failing at this one. I will make myself small monthly goals to improve our food storage and emergency preparedness.


Being physically well enables us to take care of others. I feel I have this under control. I exercise regularly. I am not overweight. I eat relatively healthy, but would like to eat more fruits and vegetables and less animal products. Furthermore, I have finally been planning and making meals on a regular basis--healthy ones. I believe in proactive health.


I have lots of friends. Lots of friends whom I don't see. I will try to take it upon myself to invite people over for dinner more often. To schedule time into my week to see my friends. To manage my time better and show up to things on time!


I feel I am doing quite well emotionally. I am generally a very happy person with a very positive outlook on life. Throughout my marriage I have watched myself carefully and discovered that the times I am most upset, I am really just too tired. When I get enough sleep and don't stay up too late, I am less irritable. I will take a personal inventory of my mental and physical state when I start to get upset and figure out what the real cause of my emotions is. I will go to bed early.

Speaking of going to bed early...crap. I stayed up too late writing this. Good night!


Chris said...

Great message Molly. January is such a perfect time to reflect, take stock and recommit. The Church self reliance guidelines really are all inclusive and you've just inspired me to broaden my New Year's resolutions. My main goal for 2010 is to take inventory of my progress at the beginning of each month. Not wait until 2011 to get back on track!

Julianne said...

This is great, Molly. Do you mind if I link to it on my blog?

Molly said...

Julianne--I wouldn't mind at all! What a complement! I love reading your blog!

Ella said...

Very cool, Molly. I am trying to get more sleep too. It makes me a much more pleasant mother. Keep up the good work! :)

webster said...

Molly, I was just catching up on your blog...congrats on the baby blessing, he's adorable! (is that an okay word for a baby boy?) Question...where did you get that massive map picture from on your wall?

Carbonneau said...

have you seen this blog?

I LOVE the handouts and gets me super excited to do my VT. Plus, It has a little handout for you to paste all this you just typed out and put it in a spot you can look at regularly. :) Thanks for posting your goals!

Tamra said...

Great thoughts, Molly. Thanks for sharing.

Dana said...

Since we are in a new ward, I don't have visiting teachers yet and I am not one either yet so thank you for the visiting teaching lesson. I'm totally serious. It really is essetial to have one. I like your list by the way.

Anonymous said...

Brim over I acquiesce in but I about the list inform should secure more info then it has.