Monday, November 23, 2009

dear itch monster

Dear itch monster,

My name is Graham and I'm writing to ask you to leave my mom alone. All she does is talk about how her skin itches and it's getting kind of annoying. She's kind of a wimp when it comes to being uncomfortable. She's not as fun as she was before all the itching, and she is spending our life savings on every lotion, cream, and ointment recommended to her. She doesn't sing to me as much as before and she's constantly trying to convince me to sleep even when I'm not tired (just so she can sleep). I'd like my fun mom back.

She keeps talking about how she'd like to clean her room, and organize my room, and make our Christmas stockings, and make Christmas presents, and make food for Thanksgiving. Instead she takes lots of showers and baths, puts on sticky creams, sits on the couch all day, and takes naps.

It's really boring. SO, itch monster, if you could just move on and leave our house alone, we'd greatly appreciate it. You're welcome to stay until her dermatology appointment on Wednesday, but after that you've officially overstayed your welcome.

Thanks,

Baby G